Sweety you can do this on your own dont ever let a man tell you to have an abortion if he cant take responsibililty for his actions then so be it you and baby will be grand on your own as you have each other. As the others have said, do not let him pressure you into an abortion you don't want. However, if you ARE keeping the baby, please be aware that, by making this decision, your child will probably not have much of a father. I'm having a baby by my ex and he isn't a good guy. This time around isn't remotely the same, he doesn't want our baby, we've been together over four years and are both 24. You can all but try your best with telling him about scan dates etc and maybe text him with pics he may come round but be prepared if he doesnt. Make an adoption plan for your child. I just found out im pregnant today and I told the father I wanted to keep it. My Baby father decided that he doesn’t love me anymore after 10 years of being in a relationship with me. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. To keep my boyfriend, I got rid of my baby. I wish I'd been strong enough to stand my ground and be a single mother than to let him have his way and then for him to end the relationship anyway because he wanted to forget I'd ever been pregnant rather than support me through the loss of our child. If he does, it still doesn’t undermine all the work that you’ve done on your own. 1. I wish I'd never told him (he's 25 btw), but it was the right thing to do. All he has to … Doesn’t go to many of our sons games to watch him play, doesn’t take an interest in the sport our song is playing. Big hugs ((((((((((())))))))))))). BUT he is the father of the child, and you have to think about how the child's life will be with an unsupportive father. ... a father embarks on what Mariella Frostrup calls “the extraordinary epiphanies of bringing up a child”. We were very devastated that we were pregnant and I told my sister, he told his brother and wife. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and … But he has options (vasectomy) if he really doesn't want another kid and doesn't want to force women to have abortions. It doesn't matter to my boyfriend though was very depressed and upset. I think you should proceed and make your decisions as if he wasn't in the picture, as you don't know whether he'll change his mind or indeed if you do want him to be part of your life. Doesn’t engage him in discussion, never asks our son anything about what’s going on in his teenage life. It's devastating when your kids' father doesn't see them. He also has other kids and his fiance died 4 months ago and we started dating shortly afterwards. Oh my heart bleeds. If you’re not, then you can terminate your pregnancy and your man simultaneously. My partner doesn’t seem interested in my pregnancy. I don’t want him anywhere close to my kid because he’s psychologically abusive and doesn’t even want her at all, because … It is not wrong to keep it from him because he has left you and and has no plans of getting back together with you. My advice is to talk to a therapist/councillor to work out your options. DS2 10lbs 7oz - out early due to growing on the 13lb line! You have to do what's right for you and baby. If you want to keep the baby, then you keep him/her!!! It was a response to an email I had sent to a friend telling her I was 12 weeks pregnant and that the father was someone I had met during my summer abroad. The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. We subscribe to the HONcode principles of the, Terminating for your partner will not save your relationship, Know that reluctant dads can change their minds, Pregnancy symptoms you should never ignore, Breastfeeding: the trick to a comfy latch, My partner doesn't seem excited about our baby. I don't want my son to have any type of negative influence by him therefore i don't want my ex to be involved in my son's life. I wouldn't worry about his feelings too much, if he was that bothered he should have been more careful. If your child’s deadbeat father doesn’t take a parenting education seminar? He keeps saying that I can't do this, that he's going to kill himself. ... all of your together i will put up on Facebook you should see my woman .not bad for little dick loser hey as you say .keep cocking your ass up in pubs I’m sure you find that fun and your big wage at the coffee club ha ha .and your wifeys ha ha . Scarring him for life? What should I do? Not. In a variety of ways, having the baby entails conditions and obligations that he doesn’t want. My partner and I have argued non-stop since I became pregnant. All contents copyright © BabyCenter, L.L.C. What is wrong. or if anyones experienced this do men normally change their mind when the babies born? Keep your child.. give him a choice. By Piyush Jain Nov 07, 2016. As Father’s Day approaches, it may be time to rethink the question of a father’s rights and responsibilities, to take some of our most cherished and unexamined slogans and see if they are fair. If he still doesnt want to know, then you and your baby are better off without him. You have a lot of time to consider your options. It’s a real point in your favor. Let's say the mother doesn't want the pregnancy to continue but the father does. He said he didn't want to be around my child and it was my decision to keep it. I am 23 and just found out last week I am pregnant with my boyfriends baby. That I'll be a bad Mum, that I won't be able to cope etc. I am now married to the father of my baby and things are getting better and better for us all the time. She can attempt — through all the mechanisms women have always known about — to end the pregnancy. What can I do? “It's her body” means it is her, the woman. I have struggled on whether or not to keep my baby when it's born , however now i've got very attatched to my pregnancy and i don't want anything more. It's your choice please don't let him bully you. He told me he wasn't going to be apart of my child's life and that I needed to have abortion. She may realize the high risks of getting … tell him making you have an abortion would scar you physically and mentally for life,a nd if he didn't want to risk having kids he should have double-bagged his cock every time he had sex. We subscribe to the HONcode principles of the, Breastfeeding: the trick to a comfy latch. I am sure that you will find a better person that will be suited to be the father of your child. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. I can’t look at him in the same way anymore, and I don’t feel the love for him that I once did. 15 Things To Do If Someone Doesn't Want To Keep The Baby Plenty of mothers who have an unplanned pregnancy end up coming to terms with their status as a parent and end up wanting to keep the baby after all. ?Please leave your answers and comments below! I don’t know how to do this without him. They'll take it direct from his wages before it even gets to him, and pay it to you. If he doesn't want to be involved its his loss and the baby may well be better off without him x. I'm 10 and a half weeks pregnant and 19. You can still achieve your goals, even if you have this baby, but you have to realise what your goals are, and how hard it … You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. By clicking the button, you agree to our policies and to get emails from us. To keep my boyfriend, I got rid of my baby. I told him that i don't want an abortion and he said that if i don't have an abortion he wont support me in any way or want anything to do with the baby. My husband, his dad, never spends time w our son. I have no idea how to go about this or what i can say to him.Please help! Tell your friends and parents and get your support network in place. He is 20 and his father is a pastor. The father of my baby is 25 and I’m 17. Here are some potential reasons why one partner doesn’t want a baby when the other does. 2. If you want this baby then like it or not he will have to contribute as he if 50% responsible for the baby being conceived! I have struggled on whether or not to keep my baby when it's born , however now i've got very attatched to my pregnancy and i don't want anything more. I dare say he is scared witless at the prospect of being a father at 21 maybe give him some time? My partner won't talk to me about our relationship problems. xxx. I grew up without my biological father and would not want that for my little girl. My boyfriend is in Jail and won't be out in time for the birth of our daughter. He might leave you anyway. ... "When I found out I was pregnant, my partner made it clear to me that he wasn't ready to be a dad. We are continuing to live together, because we both don’t have the money to move. You might leave him. This time I'm more terrified about killing my baby than I am keeping it. I'm 10 and a half weeks pregnant and 19. A few years back I fell pregnant and at only 6 weeks along miscarried it was a rough time for us both and especially my boyfriend who at that point wanted a child. He won't have a choice in the matter. 1997-2021 All rights reserved. We both wanted to keep the baby but decided not to rekindle the relationship. Ironically, our relationship is ruined anyway. Unfortunately the world is full of guys like him! At the very beginning me and the father of the baby agreed to have an abortion, however we haven't talked untill last thursday and before then when i told him i was pregnant. Do You Keep A Baby By A Man Who Doesn't Want The Baby?? The only decision you have is whether you’re going to keep the baby. The idea that including the father on the birth certificate makes it easier for him to get custody is a misconception. To give you the best experience, BabyCentre’s website and emails use cookies and similar tracking systems to personalise the content and ads we provide to you. As for changing his mind, I dont think you can do that im afraid but I would certainly keep the door open for him. My wife doesn’t want a child – but I do. Ultimately it's your decision whether to keep your baby or not. Parents' tips: why I'm glad to be pregnant. Can I give my baby her fathers last name if he is not present at time of birth? My heart hurts, and he is already talking to someone new. Maybe send him scan pics and even a birth pic if he still hasnt made an effort. The father doesn't want to know nothing about it as it was quite a casual relashionship for him. I said "NO" I am keeping it. He also just had a one year old baby with another' casual ' relashionship and recognised the little one as his own. I was sleeping with the father of my baby for about a month or so untill i found out i was pregnant and he is 21. I was sleeping with the father of my baby for about a month or so untill i found out i was pregnant and he is 21. He may be the father but he does not need to know right now because there is so much going on in your life. Abortion isn't an option for me, but is there any way i can make him change his mind? He agreed … More . Keep the lines of communication open with this 'man' and with luck he may come round and wish to be involved in the future. Birth certificate Paternity. My partner and I separated before I realised I was pregnant. He showed his true colors after i became pregnant and now i fear for myself as well as any guy i may date later on in life because of the threats he made. You cannot make him have any involvement with baby and given his reaction you may not want him to until he has grown up. He says if i go through with the pregnancy i'll be scarring him for life. Fathers' rights In some cases the father wants the baby while the mother wants an abortion The abortion issue is largely devoted to dealing with the rights of the foetus and the mother. I’m not saying whether this is right or fair. If he chooses not too, then say I don't want your money or your involvement with the child. You may have the abortion and be in this position again next year. Have the baby, parent the child yourself, and take advantage of the support system you DO have. I want him listed as the father on her birth certificate and I also want her to have his last name. We use your health information to make our site even more helpful. I made that mistake and while the father of my child got to walk away (we broke up two months after the abortion because he couldn't deal with my "mood swings") and forget about it, I'm the one who has spent the last eleven years grieving and hating myself for it. He didn’t know I … It doesn’t sound like Mr. Bottle-Popping Club-Hopper is attempting to deny paternity. In reality, your baby's father can formally request custody or visitation at any time—whether he's on the birth certificate or not. Seriously hon don't let him bully you in to doing something YOU don't want. I'd find a unbiased counselor (your ob/gyn may be able to give you some recommendations) to explore your options and make a decision that feels right to you. Dont let him tell you otherwise. I agree with the others! Sometimes couples will conceive a baby b. But to me He said he doesn't want nothing to do with the child and doesn't want his family to know.I think it's because of ethinc reason. As cupcakes said, the CSA will MAKE him support his child financially. The people we have told are very supportive of us keeping the baby. It is worse with our 16 yr old son. You tried to learn more information, and you showed the judge that you take your job as a parent seriously, and you want to do the best job possible. Ask a lawyer - … I am so glad that I made my own choice though and continued the pregnancy. Grew up without my biological father and would not want that for little. – but I do n't let him bully you in to doing something do. Have always known about — to end the pregnancy the relationship child 's life and that I ca do! 'M having a baby by a man who does n't matter to my boyfriend, got... 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